Stellah in the City.

And it's still carrying on ... Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. So I took a sabbatical from online dating. I know, I know that I committed to six months of it. That's still my intention but if I am honest with you there were some things that happened as a result of lockdown and it made me feel like I needed to get off all social media platforms to readjust, refocus and stop pretending like I'm fine. The way of the world is not fine. Whatever we believe about this virus, it has still turned our lives upside down. As I mentioned before, I am not a huge online person. I struggle to sit on my phone. Life's pressures were a lot and this online dating thing was just adding more pressure and I've had a few meltdowns. Don't get me wrong, I am still committed to exploring and seeing if I can meet a potential life partner online. But for now, it's a pause. This endeavour needs to be fun as well. Right now, it's not. Til later xo Stellah

Dahlings Yoh yoh yoh yoh yoh!! Guyzini! Oh my word. Today I got a 'like' from someone who said he wants to get kinky. At first I didn't understand what he was talking about. He said his name is Daddy Dom and he is looking for Subs. Since I watch a lot of YouTube I thought he was talking about subscribers - even though that didn't make sense. Also, I was like "why is this man referring to himself as Daddy, he must really love being a father". (yes, I am very naive) Until I read on AND THEN I REALISED!!!! THE DEVIL IS A LIAR! Ok, so it's been a week and I have had a few interactions with some people. There is no one that I can sing "this is it, ohhhh I've finally found someone". I'll tell you about the interactions as I recall them, they are in no particular order: On Elite Singles, there were two guys I was chatting with. I sort of vanished for the weekend - simply because I needed space from my phone - but when I came back t...

Welcome to another exciting installation of a girl who hates dating, cannot go out because...COVID and hates being glued to her phone but also wants a life partner so she has decided to online date. Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks Today is Thursday and there is some progress: On Sunday or Monday or something, I sent pictures to friends to vet for the dating site. They chose and I went with what I wanted. (it's pretty much the same pictures) I did extensive research. I mean hours and hours because I'm psycho maybe? I read so many reviews. So many. Also, there are so many dating sites! Did you know there is a dating site only for BBWs? Apparently that stands for Big Black Women. Didn't know either. Is that not a fetish? Needless to say I didn't sign up on that one as I suspect there will be weird pervs I eventually signed up on two dating sites. They are called Elites Singles for professionals and the other is Tinder:  Elite cost me an arm and a...

Dahlings It's been a while... Let me start by saying that I hate dating. Whenever I write a post about my dating life, please always remember and refer to the above statement. I have a friend of mine who once said "I wish we all had bar codes that only matches with your life partner. We will not waste each other's time, we will know immediately if it's the right person for us." How I wish that were the case. We are in the thick of COVID-19. I have been in lockdown for almost 4 weeks. I have had a lot of time to think and I've just woken to the realisation that I am 34. I don't feel bad about my age at all. I love the thirties. I feel like it's such a romantic age with myself. I'm digressing. This is not a post about the thirties. The reason why I decided to publish my age is that I always felt like I was 27 until I realised I was 34. You know what that means for us women....tick tock.... I was watching a clip of The View on YouTube ...

..and making it in Johannesburg Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. Over the weekend I was driving somewhere. I can't remember where to but I was driving on William Nicol and it was evening time. You see, whenever I drive in the evening and there are lots of cars and lights and activity I get excited. When I moved here I was so freaking excited. Every small thing excites me about this place - almost. The crime doesn't excite me. The crazy levels of anxiety from life here doesn't excite me. BUT the possibilities here excite me so friggin much! Sorry, I'm digressing a little. As I mentioned, when I moved here I was so excited. I just new that this was the place I am meant to be. I always thought that I would live here for a couple of years and then move to New York. It's been about six years but I can't see myself living anywhere else yet (maybe I need to travel to NY before I make such a bold statement). I also used to tell people in East London th...

And I refuse to be left behind! Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. So, we left off on a weird note last time. I'm very aware that my life could be a lot worse and I may have sounded like a spoilt brat. Believe me I know. My life has been worse. Really worse. Really really worse. Not worse like living under a bridge kind of worse but I've been through my fair share of crap. I don't know about you, but sometimes things just get heightened and I feel overwhelmed. My mind is all over the show today so this post may reflect that - I apologise in advance. Driving home from work, I was listening to a podcast where the guest was asked what her word for the year was. I can't remember what she said because I took that question to heart and tried to remember my word; and I remember it being: ELEVATION. I had a retrospective session in my mind to see if I feel like my life is being elevated and I think there is some traction - not enough but some. I don't know...

Is it the same thing? Hi Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. It's been a minute I know but life sometimes just gets in the way of having fun. Right now, I should be writing my last test for the semester (and then it's exams YAY! - sarcasm) but I have had this lingering thought for so long that right now it is bubbling over and I know I won't be able to focus until I put it out into the internet-universe like a true millennial. Life is hard. Life is effing hard. Ok I'm done bye! Jokes. I love stories. I love reading stories. I love hearing stories. I love watching stories. I love telling stories. I believe that everyone has a story to tell. The stories that I gravitate towards are 'rags to riches stories' or stories about how people had to suffer to get to their next level of success. It motivates me to strive for more in my life. It's almost like 'the grinding porn'. It's addictive. I NEED to hear stories like that on the...