Stellah in the City.

Mine was fabulous thanks. Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. So this Christmas consisted of food, great company and a portable swimming pool (I wish I had taken pics of the pool). We ate and ate and ate. Then chilled in the pool. The challenge with the pool is that it was two thirds my height and there was one two-step step ladder. The word "challenge" is even an understatement. I needed the ladder and J (the only guy in the picture) to help me get out. The swimming costume I wore - which I hadn't fitted in a looooong time - was SUPER sexy. My boobs were more out of the costume than in (I feel like the level of sexy on the costume makes it need a name. Shall we call it Svetlana?). I felt like I should be getting paid to look like that. I am waaay too conservative for such. BUT... The food was delicious, the weather was glorious and the company was just what the soul needed. We laughed and reminisced. We played games in the pool, pretended...

No, seriously....I am super cool with it. You might even say I'm happy with that... Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. So this year, I broke tradition and I did not go back to the EC for Christmas. I know...perish the thought...blah blah...I'm actually glad I chose that decision. Yeah, I said it. Don't get me wrong, I love going back to the village/ezilalini. I think I've mentioned before that as I grow older, the more I love going back to Cofimvaba. Literally, I feel like ndiyokukha amandla (directly translated: 'to fetch strength') Do what you will with that English. I also miss my nieces and nephews desperately. Here are my reasons for not going to the EC: a) I need to be financially responsible. I always end up spending more than I should and start the year off Janu-worrying. I am putting myself through varsity and it's costing me twelve arms and three legs. There are other financial goals I want to meet and need to sacrifi...

Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. The end of the year has literally snuck up on me. I did not expect it at all. AT ALL. I still can't believe that when I write the date tomorrow it will be 01/12/2018. If time sprints as quickly as it has been then day after tomorrow I will be writing 01/01/2019. Yup, it's Friday night and I'm home alone. I am still at war within myself because I feel like I should be out there playing with other kids, making the pots to happen and meeting new people, etc. The plans I had were cancelled and I said "Thank you Lord" because I LOVE being home on a Friday night. I feel like I can really decompress from the hectic week. But I digress.... Have you ever felt like change is happening atmospherically but in the physical realm nothing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING is happening. I've been feeling for quite some time that I need to prepare myself for big changes. I feel like the changes are gonna be everywhere. Big changes. Good cha...

Dahlings. How are you? I'm fine thanks. So, I've been thinking about current world events and specifically my beloved country South Africa. I love this country and continent so much, I have it tattooed on my back. True. Story. I have realised that SA has Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Here under are the consequences: We have psycho leadership. ...and I get why they are psychos. Most of them were freedom fighters. They were conditioned to survive & thrive under extreme human conditions. Imagine you are born into an oppressive system where you have to fight for your birth right and basic human rights by PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT EVEN FROM YOUR COUNTRY! Imagine watching your family members, friends, peers, colleagues being tortured - to death in many instances - because they were born 'the wrong skin color'. Imagine that from the day you were born until your 50's you were in a militant environment. Imagine you have had to torture to help your people ...

Dahlings Hi, how are you? I'm fine thanks. Tomorrow & Wednesday I write Business Maths & Accounting. I'm flipping out but not really flipping out. I'm feeling confident that I will pass these exams. I am not too confident that I will get distinctions and that is what I am aiming for. So there's that... I had so many plans this year; I wanted to vlog & blog more consistently. I wanted to save money. I wanted to take my fitness to another level, read books, become more vegan, recycle more, lose weight, save puppies, eat spinach, climb Kilimanjaro, become Beyonce and invent water. Essentially, I wanted to become a mix between, Oprah, Mother Theresa, Yvonne Orji, Casey Neistat and Sarah's Day. That didn't happen. So there's that... I'm still single. So there's that.... I still haven't lost any weight. So there's that.... I don't know what my point is here but I am realising that I have a little over 2 months to make mo...

Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. Firstly, since I started working at my current place of employment I have realised that every time I start a sentence I say "so..."! My English teacher would be beside herself. My mother is probably turning in her grave!!! Fun fact: My mother was a language teacher and was very passionate about it. Anyways... I digress. So, I reread my previous post & I realised that although I needed to acknowledge that I am creative, one of the reasons I didn't want to say it out loud was because I feel like labels can be boxing (ah...finally I sound like a millennial). I am a lot of things which a lot of the time seem paradoxical (I had to double check the meaning of this word because I wanted to sound clever. Lolsies). My normal day job and qualification is business analysis & project management. I love it! I love all of it! I love that it scares me a lot of the time. I love that I feel out of my depth one hundred percent ...

Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. Actually...no. I am not fine. I'm highly PMSing. During this period (pardon the pun) I am very emotional, kinda like stab myself in the eye kind of anger and sadness. Dramatic, I know but whatever. Ugh. The reason why I am telling you that I am PMSing is that I think this post will be highly raw. I may regret it because I am a private person. Perhaps it's a good thing to lay out all these thoughts that have been sprinting in my head for the last couple of months. They are living thoughts and we know thoughts that become words eventually manifest into actions. Brace yourselves, this is probably going to be a brain dump and it may not make sense. (please don't hate me... love me, I'm sensitive and just follow along). Firstly, I need to say this...I am a creative. Phew! I've never said this outloud before. I've acknowledged my creative side but I've never fully embraced it. Why? Because creatives come across a...

Hey friends So over the last few months I have been so moved (sometimes to tears) by how much women go through in South Africa and the continent at large on a daily basis. This post is going to be a little bit of a rant and very vulnerable but hopefully it will lead me to no just write about it but do something about it. I don’t know what needs to change but something has to give. I moved to Johannesburg a little over five years ago. The first 18 months were rough! REALLY rough! A friend of mine and I would say (she was going through the most during that time too) that we were being baptized into adulthood by fire! It makes me clap once when I think about that time. I was so broke I could not afford to buy toiletries, especially sanitary towels. I went for months using toilet paper. You can only imagine the discomfort and how dirty I constantly felt. When I was able to buy sanitary towels, I legitimately cried in the toiletry isle at Dischem feeling so grateful but sligh...

Dahlings How are you? I'm fine thanks. (this is staying, best we all deal with it) I hope you're week is going great so far, mine just got exponentially better. The best feeling is finding out the root cause of something that you thought you were an evil person for the longest time. I'm so relieved I could cry. I won't because I have cheap mascara on. Allow me to elaborate. There are two parts of this story. This story is about anxiety. I can count the number of times I've had a full on anxiety attack where I feel like I can't breath and think I'm dying. I know when I'm very stressed my entire left arm gets so painful that it goes numb and there's a knot on the left hand side of my back that triggers the left arm process thingy. The left arm issue got very bad when I just moved to Joburg that I went to see the doctor (I only see the doctor when I literally feel like I'm dying otherwise self diagnosis all the way beech) and h...

I still don't have a bomb way to start a post so here we go... Hi, how are you? I'm fine thanks. I wanted to title this post "AM I NORMAL" and then I thought ' girl nothing about you is normal'. So this post might not have a title. Time will tell. Anyways, I digress. Towards the end of the year last year I started feeling burnt out from being too busy. I was working, studying and had a thriving social life. Don't get me wrong those are nice life problems. I often hear of people say "I struggle to make friends"; for me it is the opposite - I struggle not to make friends. I am very aware that I am blessed in that regard but this comes with its own challenges. I am the sort of person who goes all out for friends and family to a point that it may negatively impact me. I love giving & I love knowing that if a family member or a friend needs something I will be able to help. I have many memories (some of which I vlogged ) from being part...

I have no amazing way to start this blog post so I'll start with...  "Hello. How are you? I am fine thanks" I know. Earth shattering. I'm a young-ish single lady that lives in Johannesburg. It's been close to five years of living here and I am starting to feel like I can call this city my home away from home. I moved here from a little city called East London in the Eastern Cape . I was born in an even smaller town called Mthatha. Some of the greatest South African legends come from there and the rest from my homestead Cofimvaba. I think it would be tacky to mention that my hero and a man with a beautiful mind Tat'Thabo Mbeki (Dutywa which is a stone throw away) & the world's hero Tat'Rholihlahla Mandela were born (Qunu which is also a stone throw away) in Mthatha because that would be name dropping. (When we had the land - there were lots of stones to throw.. I couldn't resist that one...lol) I'm not sure what ...